Monday, April 23, 2007

Brainstorm #2

Time once again to get the old grey cells working as we attempt to solve one of the problems of modern-day football, and today's scenario is given to us by Chelsea manager José Mourinho.

Following his team's 0-0 draw with Newcastle United yesterday, 'The Special One' bemoaned the fact that Middlesbrough hadn't been awarded a penalty in the dying moments of their game against Manchester United on Saturday. It would have almost certainly won them the game causing United to lose all three points enabling Chelsea to close the gap in their race for the Premiership title with Sir Alex Ferguson's men.

Mourinho was quoted as saying: "It was a penalty at Old Trafford. It was a penalty to us. We are talking about points. It is not a conspiracy, it is fact. I speak facts. If you tell me it was not a penalty for Sheffield United, or a penalty for Middlesbrough, or for us against Newcastle, I must go to my optician."

So what are you to do if you feel your arch-enemies are being given preferential treatment by every referee in the country?

Mr. Mourinho, you're in luck as SPAOTP has the answer. We've been working through the night to come up with a solution and after much mental gymnastics, this is it:

Win more games, thereby avoiding the reliance on other teams being awarded occasional penalties.

It's a solution we like, and we hope you like it too.

Next time on Brainstorm: Neil Warnock asks why poor teams should even be allowed to play in the Premiership.


Timothy B. said...

I completely agree with that. He has nobody to blame but himself. He's probably still upset about the team of the season being mostly United players. I picture him at home throwing darts at a team picture of ManU.

Chris said...

That's hilarious!!! I think you've got a comedy sketch waiting to be written there!!!


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